You know how men are depicted on sitcoms – they are gross or sloppy or they sit in the recliner with their feet up while their wives vacuum under their footrests ( I mean all men who are married but I guess this could also be linked specifically to the “Sister Wives” series…)? I know nothing of the sort.
Yes, my husband has spent a little while on his I-pad on his days off, but that is as bad as it gets over here. He is clean and organized and hates sitting around and staring at the walls (which is very relaxing, I might try to persuade you…).Clutter and chaos are his kryptonite and in a lot of ways this has rubbed off on me. But not when it comes to wrapping extension cords.
Side bar – did you know there is a correct way of storing and wrapping extension cords that will not only make them easier to use, but keep them in good repair, thus extending their lifetimes? Oh, you didn’t? Lucky for you I can tell you, because now I know…
How not to wrap and store extension cords:
1. While holding the plug in your hand, take the cord from you wrist, pulling taught to your elbow. Wind the cord around your elbow and head back to your wrist. Wrapping around your wrist, head again toward your elbow. Repeat for the length of the cord, securing the wrapping by connecting the male and female ends of the cord.
2. Leave cord in a large mass and cover it with a towel. When the purchaser of the cord exclaims “What in the hell happened here”?! Make big eyes and slowly raise both of your palms skyward doing your best “Michelle Tanner” impression. (Note – this has never worked for me, but maybe you are cuter??)
3. Taking the extension cord in one hand make like a live enactment of da Vinci’s “Vitruvian Man” handing the cord off from left to right. If this results in a wonky looking ball of covered wire – see above for tips of what to do next. (Hint: get a towel ready).
How to wrap and store extension cords
1. The over-under method. Starting with your non-dominate hand; put the end of the cord in it. Grab the excess cord with your dominate hand and at one end pull the cord so that you have about three feet of cord in your hands to loop up to a loose coil. Hold your new loop with your dominate hand and take your non-dominate hand to the excess cord near the bottom of your first loop. For the under part, grab it so that your palm is facing out, grabbing the cable from the bottom (You will be making a thumbs down maneuver) and flip it up so that your hands are together again and your thumbs down is now a thumbs up. Go back to over now – wrapping the cord in an overhand motion. This will create equal looking loops that sit flush with each other. Finally wrapping it up by securing the male and female ends together.
2. Ask your husband to show you “one more time” how to do this. As in every single time an extension cord needs to be put away while you study him unblinkingly. In about ten years you should have mastered it.
Now you might wonder why exactly extension cord wrapping is a part of our lives. That goes back to all the great and impressive things my dude does that I probably haven’t thanked him enough for – starting with the building of the house and landing on a soft spot for his Clark Griswold level of Christmas light spectaculars. My need is limited to blowing off the driveway and vacuuming the cars – oh and that one time I used the saw to cut wood for Little Sister’s bed – LIKE A TOTAL LUMBERJACK BOSS!
The point of my post has little to do with teaching one how to wrap and extension cord – though I think it’s a pretty cool party trick and way more to serve as a love letter to my guy. I saved the $4.99 on the greeting card that I could never find printed with the following words:
My darling dear, I love you so,
But above all else, you should know,
I love your face, and love your feet,
And my oh my those cords hang neat!
Weird how that isn’t universally available, no?